Finished!

I'm done with school and I'm done with Harry Potter! I think I'm more excited about the latter :) I'm happy that after a year of night school, I get to cook and eat dinner with the kiddies and read them bedtime stories.

Overall I was pleased with Harry Potter. I will miss him. I'm getting back into the Jane Green book now, which was quite ignored while I was engrossed in Harry. It's decent enough, but tonight, as I was reading a scene in which the main character and her husband decide to separate, possibly divorce, I found myself, inexplicably, crying. It has been a year and a half, and it astounds me how sometimes it feels like yesterday, how sometimes my feelings are still so raw. It makes me wonder, how long does it take to get over this? There are moments, images, that are burned into my brain, and when I think of them I am sent right back to that awful time, and I feel as if I haven't really changed at all.

I have been so snappy with the kiddies the past couple of days. It's the conflicting, clashing feelings of wanting so badly to be a great momma and spend time with them versus feeling tired and frustrated, wishing they would shut up and go away. I feel like I want to get away but there's nowhere to go. My parents are coming to join us at the lake tomorrow, but sometimes I feel like they are more of a hindrance than helpful. I'm breaking my "no contact with the outside" rule by text-messaging my best friend. Kiddies were sent to bed by their irritable mother (too much bickering, screaming, and whining). Now I wish I had someone to talk to.